Birthdays .

Today is Betsey's 67th birthday and tomorrow is Stewart's 98th. Bless you both - I miss you.

Elizabeth Crockett Shay (1958-2016)

Me, with my brother, Stewart (1927-2013). ****************************** LATER: The 24th and the 25th turned out to be record-breaking hot days, in the 90's. So we stayed at home. John found an AC unit at Mr. G's Discount Store in N. Walpole, NH and installed it in the livingroom, so we haven't suffered.

The AC unit in the LR. It vents hot air out the Window and drains water into a pan which has to be emptied every four hours or so.*********** Jim and Mary Tolles were visiting from Maine but they stayed in a motel at night. I spent a good portion of those hot days napping. Suzie McQuen, my niece, called to mark the day of her dad's birthday, but I was asleep when she called. Stewart and Betsey, you are remembered with love!

A new era.

This past week or so has been different physically. Last Monday I woke up and was suddenly extremely weak and could hardly move. I was unable to get to the bathroom, or get out to my recliner chair in the livingroom. Fortunately we had an easy fix for the toilet issue - a port-a-potty that can be placed right next to the bed. Similarly, I can brush my teeth and use the water pic with a pan sitting on the edge of the bed. Eventually I was able to get out to my chair. But even though I'm better now, it feels like a new phase of the illness - more terminal. My PCP wants to test for a UTI, but we are also going to apply for Hospice care. The main change is that it makes "going out" sort of problematic. So I've mostly been home. I've had a lot of visitors and calls and texts, expressing support. My granddaughter, Katie, is here right now - she flew out from St. Louis last Thursday. I've had two "small choir" visits from Guilford Church - that has been wonderful. And it has also cracked me open more - I've been talking a lot more about dying with Ellen, John and others. I've also been sleeping more during the day. All this has affected my sense of time - especially of free time. and that has had an effect on this blog. So here we are! I have no idea what the future holds, especially whether I'll be alive. That makes living very interesting. Every day is a gift, for sure. Here are some photos - I'll organize and label them later.

This year's rhododendron crop - some winter-kill is evident when you compare this photo with last year.

Dummerston Center cemetery has been un-mowed all spring leaving a profusion of wild flowers which enhance but also almost hide Betsey and Shirley's grave flowers.

A new development! We've moved the TV downstairs to the livingroom so I don't have to use stairs to watch TV.

Katie Shay, visitng for a few days and thus here when a small choir came from the Guilford Church.

Filling In.

In addition to reading aloud from Ernest Gaines' A Lesson Before Dying, several things have happened since we visited The Clark Institute: (1) I was supposed to lead the Dummmerston choir in Here I Am, Lord on May 18th, but didn't feel up for it and passed it on to Mary Westbrook. I listened later to the service on Facebook, and the choir sounded great. (2) I observed the 27th anniversary of Shirley's death on May 24th by listening to one of her 1997 GCC services (from the GCC archive available on the GCC homepage). (3) The Morris Dancers held their annual Memorial Day weekend Ale, with several groups at the GCC pavilion after church on May 25th. (4) Peter Falion, Helen Merena and Andy Davis came on Wednesdays to be with me while Ellen took some time off (typically to meet someone for lunch - like her sister Katie). Fred Breunig is coming today. (5) We had the last session of our retired Clergy group this spring on May 29th; we'll reconvene in the fall. (6) A small Group from rhe Guilford Choir came and sang hymns for me at home, later in the afternoon on May 29th. (7) Plus, Ellen has created a lovely deck garden, despite a lot of cold, rainy weather. And last Monday, we had an unexplained power outage - a short one, fortunately - which caught us by surprise (i.e., no bad weather).

Above: Morris Dancers at GCC Pavilion.

Group that came to sing for me: Nan, Fred, Ginny, Cathy, Helen, Rachel and Carole. Plus Ellen.

Green Mountain Power Truck, checking out our power outage.

Deck Garden.*********************************** Oh yes, and one more thing: We've made a big change in the livingroom. With John's help, we moved the TV from the upstairs bedroom down to the end of the couch in the livingroom. This means I don't have to go upstairs to watch TV, and in particular, it means if I have to use the bathroom during a TV program, I don't have to come downstairs and then go back up again. John got a long coaxial cable to extend the antenna cable from upstairs down to the LR, and since a long cable weakens the signal from the antenna, he found a signal booster which he added to the system. He also has gotten an additional cable which links my iPhone to the TV, so now we can watch a program or movie on the phone and display it on the TV. This has been great! We most recently watched The Autobiography of Jane Pittman, which is on YouTube, and very much worth a look if you are interested.

The TV in its new location.

I'm okay.

I know that when I don't put up something on my blog for quite a while, some might wonder if I'm okay, so this is just assurance that I am. I'm not sure why I have neglected this blog for so long. I think one reason is that we have been aggressively pursuing a practice of reading aloud, and I don't work on my blog while Ellen reads to me. And then other things come along when she is not reading. So I guess you can say life is full. Most recently, Ellen has been reading from Ernest J. Gaines' 1993 novel A Lesson Before Dying. This is a powerful work. Set in Lousiana, at the novel's center is Jefferson, a young black man sentenced to death for three unintended murders which take place during a robbery which Jefferson was involved in, but he was not in any way responsible for the murders. He had the bad luck to be the one left standing, alive. His court-appointed defense attorney, speaking in court, compares his impending execution to the slaughter of a "hog," in a misguided effort to elicit sympathy for his client from the court. Jefferson seems to buy into this characterization and refuses to talk with his family - he is, he says, "nothing but a hog." Grant Wiggins, a local black teacher, is recruited by Jefferson's family to help him face his death "like a man." This sets up an excruciatingly painful relationship between the two men, but one in which they both grow emotionally over time. The novel received several awards and was made into a movie for TV. Gaines died November 5, 2019, age 86.

Ernest J. Gaines (1933-2019). ************************** Looking for the movie based on this novel on YouTube, I ran across another movie based on a Gaines novel, The Autobiography of Jane Pittman, starring Cecily Tyson. and we watched that movie yesterday. That is also a powerful work! Gaines should be far better-known than he is. I am grateful to have discovered him and his work.

A few more works.

The Clark has a fairly large collection of works by Renoir: a gallery is devoted to his work. This portrait caught my eye because this young woman reminded me a bit of Tamar, Ellen's granddaughter.

P-A. Renoir (1841-1919), Thérèse Berard, 1879. ************************ I like this bust of Balzac. I have not read any Balzac for a long time. I remember loving Père Goriot

Bust of Balzac by Pierre-Eugene-Emile Hebert (1877).

Art works at The Clark.

I took a number of photos of works of art displayed at The Clark: they permitted photos (1) of works owned by The Clark and (2) without flash. Here is a sample of a few: Winslow Homer:(1836-1910)

West Point, Prouts Neck, 1900. Homer considered this one of his best paintings. The scene is close to his studio, which is located at Prouts Neck, ME, about 12 miles south of Portland, ME. It is possible to tour his studio out of the Portland Museum of Art, by reservation only. We have never done that, but maybe we still could. Homer wrote of this painting, "The picture is painted 15 minutes after sunset. . . . not one minute before." So he must have gone to the same spot, day after day, and set up to be ready to paint fifteen minutes after sunset each day. Of the paintings we saw, this is my favorite. Here are three more paintings by Winslow Homer, of the same genre:

In the same gallery with Homer were works by an artist who was a contemporary of Homer, but represented a different region: Frederic Remington (1861-1909):

A solitary member of the Siksika (Blackfoot) Nation leans forward on his horse, gazing across the snowy landscape toward a distant encampment. The figure's pose, the horse's breath, and the glittering nightime sky create an almost palpable stillness and tension. The setting is likely what is now the province of Alberta, Canada, where Frederic Remington spent time in 1887 and 1890 and where the Siksika Nation is located today. The image is fictive, painted over a decade after after the artist's time in Canada. Remington's earlier work as an illustrator for Harper's Weekly and in particular his images of the American west, contributed to racist misconceptions about Indigenous life; this painting made later in his career, reflects a more sensiitve view.

Note the peculiar fact that all the soldiers look alike.

The Clark

The weekend of May 10-11 we didn't do anything notable that I recall, even though it was Mother's Day weekend. There was a Mother's Day brunch at the Community Center in Guilford, which we have attended in previous years and have enjoyed very much, but I just didn't feel up for it this time, so we stayed home. I think John and Cynthia came over later in the day. I know the next big thing was Tuesday. J&C had given me a Christmas present of a trip to someplace special, and we finally did it Tuesday: we went to The Clark Art Institute in Williamstown, MA, which turned out to be a spectacular place. I can't believe I've lived here over 50 years and have never gone to The Clark, which is only a 1 1/2-hour drive from here, and a very nice drive at that. The Clark opened in 1955, but was much smaller initially. The big expansion came around 2013, I think. Today it sits on 140 acres, has expansive buildings, huge galleries, as well as smaller ones, higher education facilities, a 300,000-volume art history library, a nice cafe with an outdoor patio, reflecting pool and lovely views. It is an architectural wonder, with the unforgetable feature of huge red-tinged granite blocks forming walls and corridors. Most of all, it has an amazing collection of art - European and American - Monet, Renoir, J.S. Sargeant, Winslow Homer, etc. We saw only a small part of what is on display. You could easily spend a couple of days there. I would love to go back again. I used one of their wheelchairs, which was comfortable, and E, J and C all took turns pushing me. But even so, I was exhausted by the end of the day - exhausted but happy. These snaps of the visitor's brochure give a glimpse of the size and layout of The Clark:

The main facade of The Clark.********************************** And here are some photos I took which give a feel for the building we were in:

The Café,

Just outside the Café.

In the bookstore. ELlen was thrilled to find lots of postcards!

One of the large galleries - mostly Monet

A smaller gallery.